By Maria Iliffe-Wood
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15 Nov, 2021
I sit in this chair and look out the window. I hear the washing machine churn the laundry in the kitchen. I watch the leaves on the tree turn from green, to red, to orange, to brown, to grey and then fall off. I imagine they carpet the lawn with their tawny hues. I don’t see the ground. I make up half the story, to compensate for what I can’t see, from this chair. People walk outside. Up and down the street. I imagine them going to work, to school, to play, or to the theatre, or the cinema, to a football match or a round of golf. I sit in this chair and make up stories about them. Cars come and go. I imagine them arriving at their destination, breaking down on the motorway, crashing into a lamppost, being lambasted by a forty foot artic lorry. I imagine the passengers end up in a chair, much like this one. I wave at the postman as he passes by my window. He doesn’t stop. No gifts, or parcels, cards or letters from friends, or family, or the double glazing firm that wants to sell me a new set of windows. I want to ask him about his wife, his kids, his work, his life. I know nothing about him, nor him about me, other than I’m the woman who sits in the chair and looks out of the window. He doesn’t notice the look on my face when he passes by without a glance. Next door’s cat comes into the garden. I watch her wander around. She sniffs at the plants, eats the grass, poos in the gravel at the edge of the path. I’d love her to wander in and sit on my lap, while I sit in this chair. But like everyone else, she wanders by the open door, with ne’er a look. The washing machine stops. Someone will empty it later, when they arrive to clean me up, get me dressed, tidy up around me. “I can’t stop to chat.” The nurse will say. “I’ve got too much to do, too many people to get around to, too many others to care for.” Care. That’s what she calls it. No cup of tea. No gossip about the neighbours. No catch up with what’s going on in her life. I’d love to hear what else she’s up to. She knows what I do. I sit in this chair.